(Image Above: from http://lavendercastle.com)
We’ve all heard the line, “I lost my number, can I have yours?” This is all good and well (by which I mean forehead-slapping bad), but there are far more creative ways to be unsuccessful. For a few of the funnier ones, take a gander at this week’s Top Ten Terrible Pick-Up Lines. What’s the worst pick-up line you’ve ever heard?
10. If you were a new hamburger at McDonald’s, you would be McGorgeous. No, I would not like fries with that.
9. Will you be my horcrux tonight, so l can give a piece of my soul to you? If this person isn’t JK (either the author or, “Just Kidding”), this merits use of the Evanesco spell.
8. Hey baby, you must be a light switch, ’cause every time I see you, you turn me on! One good way to kill the spark between two people.
7. I’m attracted to you like the Earth is attracted to the Sun – with a large force inversely proportional to the distance squared. Whoever uses this one might not realize the gravity of their mistake.
6. Do you have a map? ‘Cause Honey, I just keep gettin lost in your eyes. And we all thought men didn’t ask for directions.
5. You must be Windows 95, because you got me so unstable. Feel feel to boot out anyone who tries to boot up a convo with this one.
4. Whenever I am near you, I undergo anaerobic respiration, because you take my breath away. Brings up great memories of high school biology, like dissecting little creatures.
3. You’re so hot, you denature my proteins. There’s clearly no chemistry in a potential relationship here.
2. According to the second law of thermodynamics, you’re supposed to share your hotness with me. Unfortunately for this one, the world works in strange ways.
1. My love for you is like a fractal – it goes on forever. You + me no longer equals us.