The Top Ten Most Useless Laws

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Justice is Blind.  (Image above: Marks Miller Solictors London)


Laws are often a point of contention. I’m sure the following Top Ten Most Useless Laws will cause lots of debate. I mean, these laws are some of the most logical laws around. Without them, there would surely be complete chaos.

10. “No one may carry an ice cream cone in their back pocket if it is Sunday.” – State of Georgia, USA. Thank goodness they didn’t outlaw this every other day of the week. I would have melted into tears.

9. “It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.” – State of Louisiana, USA. Right. I’m sure the teller appreciates that.

8. “When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.” – State of Texas, USA. How would you solve this one?

7. “Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.” – State of Alabama, USA. Guess you’ll have to find another way to prove yourself.  Darn.

6. “It it illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors.” – State of Pennsylvania, USA. Oh good.  I much prefer sleeping on stoves.

5. “It is illegal to wear hot pink pants after midday Sunday.” - Australia. And you thought the fashion police were only found in popular magazines.

4. “You may not pay for a fifty-cent item with only pennies.” – Canada.  I’m putting in my two cents: this law is just senseless.

3. “If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.” – Florida, USA. And you thought you’d save money. Psht.

2. “One-armed piano players must perform for free.” - Iowa, USA. I’m up in arms about this! That’s discriminatory.

1.“It is illegal to push a live moose out of a moving airplane. ” - Alaska, USA. I don’t know why you’d want to be in a plane with a moose in the first place.

21 Responses to The Top Ten Most Useless Laws

  1. Kelly 08/17/2009 at 3:16 pm #

    I would love to see law #8 in action! haha…

  2. Amy 08/17/2009 at 3:19 pm #

    haha, Hannah this is hilarious! Back home in England we still have ancient laws which are still technically lawful, such as: ‘You can shoot a Welsh person with a bow and arrow in Chester, inside the city walls and after midnight.’!
    great Top 10 :)

  3. Tara 08/17/2009 at 3:45 pm #

    As far as # 1 goes, I’m assuming I’d be fine to push a dead moose out of a moving airplane then?

  4. rhea 08/17/2009 at 4:18 pm #

    #4 may be silly, but at my job I’d love to inforce it… on Fridays we get so much change I go crazy.

  5. Vince 08/17/2009 at 4:25 pm #

    This is a really great top ten list Hannah. I would love to see a picture of you sleeping on a stove, don’t think I’ve ever seen that. Anyone can post their own list to our site http://www.toptentopten.com/. The coolest feature is you can let other people vote on the rankings of your list.

  6. Dan 08/17/2009 at 4:30 pm #

    Amazing, i guess im going to go and sleep in my fridge tonite, no more ontop of! Oh shoot!

  7. Katharine 08/17/2009 at 5:48 pm #

    There’s a similar law to #3 in Detroit, MI, that you’re not allowed to chain an alligator to a fire hydrant. Other animals, I guess, are okay.

    And there’s a *completely* ridiculous one on the books in Lansing, MI, in which women are not allowed to wear lipstick lest they be mistaken for women of ill repute. Seriously.

  8. shwut 08/17/2009 at 6:10 pm #

    hahah this is utterly ridiculous.

  9. Des 08/17/2009 at 7:15 pm #

    does #9 count when playing monopoly? Because i think i broke that one O.O

  10. Tara 08/17/2009 at 7:33 pm #

    #5 is probably the best or the one about the elephant. This is hilaroious

  11. Michelle 08/17/2009 at 8:52 pm #

    These are pretty silly =] but remember…someone must of done these things in order for the laws to be made, so they’re not TOTALLY useless. More lists like this please!

  12. Laura 08/17/2009 at 10:42 pm #

    Another awesome post!

    Shoot. I guess I’ll have to drag the fridge back inside…wouldn’t want to get arrested while I’m simply trying to get a good night’s sleep!

  13. Charlene 08/18/2009 at 1:25 am #

    This reminds me of a weird law that’s apparently enforced in South Bend, Indiana.

    “It is illegal to make a monkey smoke a cigarette.”

    Whether the monkey or the person would be arrested, I don’t know.

  14. Sarah 08/18/2009 at 2:54 am #

    It’s illegal to pump your own gas in Oregon!

  15. Sway 08/18/2009 at 6:10 am #

    Hi folks,
    I hate to break your hearts, but I am an Australian, and although hot pink shorts aren’t the best look at any time of day (outside of 1984), it isn’t actually illegal in Australia to wear them…. yet.

  16. Leighann 08/18/2009 at 8:22 am #

    I’ve heard that it’s illegal to tie a giraffe by its neck to a telephone pole in Georgia….

    haha this list is great! more posts like this please!

  17. Caroline Sumner 08/18/2009 at 10:44 am #

    Here in Richmond, VA, there is a law stating it is illegal to flip a coin to see who pays for coffee. I break this law on purpose every chance I get, just to test my luck.

  18. caroline 08/18/2009 at 2:41 pm #

    haha, i love this!!! i cant beleive there are so many pointless laws!! i think the people in congress make these just to have fun with their job!

  19. Richard 08/18/2009 at 7:00 pm #

    This was a very fun read, Hannah! Thank you.

    Sarah, I think that gas pumping law is also in place in New Jersey. : )

  20. Kaitlyn 08/18/2009 at 10:00 pm #

    haha. another good useless law in Georgia is you can’t spit on the sidewalk after dark.

  21. denise 08/19/2009 at 3:17 am #

    great post. i have no idea what states enforce these laws but i remember two weird ones from playing a lot of balderdash: one state made it illegal for women to open their husbands mail (that’s just blatant patriarchy!) and in another state it’s illegal for a babysitter to eat the entire contents of a family’s fridge while on the job. who even set the precedence for the latter?

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